Thursday, January 7, 2010

dear jacques


[image: astrology weekly, no apologies]

if you live anywhere near america's most chiseled metropolis, chances are good you've heard about the asian carp heading up ole miss.  what they want is their share of lake michigan- leviathans on the brink of the multi-million dollar water sport hinterland.  a fully accredited limnologist specializing in aquatic carrying capacity, i propose sending the inimitable padre of the aqualung, jacques-yves cousteau into the river.  to the fishes- distribute some knit caps commemorating his eponymous centennial and throw in some vouchers for the new orleans aquarium, too.  if i had had the opportunity to wipe beignet dust from his chin, i'd read him his astrological chart and suggest jumping the bill.